I decided to share my story in the hope of inspiring others, providing support, and being completely raw about who I am, what my family endured, and where I am today.
In August 2023, the U.S. Women’s National Team embarked on their journey to the Paris 2024 Olympic Games. With three significant events scheduled over the next year, a squad of 28 was centralized in Charlotte, N.C. Here is the story of my unexpected path to the Olympic Games. Let’s begin.
On December 11, just a month and a half before the Olympic Qualifications, my husband, Stuart, and I discovered we were pregnant with our first child. This news came as a complete shock, as it was unplanned, but we received it with pure gratitude for the gift God gave us. Always wanting to be a mother, this news filled my heart with immense joy. However, as a hockey player preparing for an Olympic year, there was sadness in knowing I would be removed from future selections. When I announced my pregnancy to the team, I was met with tears and open arms. This team has been a pillar of support ever since.
The squad left for India for the FIH Hockey Olympic Qualifier on January 3, and my family's life changed forever. On January 31, I had an 11-week check-up appointment with my amazing gynecologist, Dr. Tyler Kirkland. What started with excitement quickly turned to worry when my ultrasound showed an unusual amount of fluid around our baby's body. We were referred to a specialist the following day for further testing. On February 5, we received devastating news: our baby girl had a severe case of Turner’s Syndrome. Babies diagnosed with Turner’s Syndrome in the womb have an extremely low chance of making it to full term.
Our hearts were broken. We had never heard of Turner’s Syndrome, it was our first baby, and our world felt as if it had turned upside down. After days of research, conversations between my husband and me, and many prayers, we chose to fight for her life. As long as our daughter, Mallory James Valzonis, chose to fight, we would fight with her. Every second with her was a gift from God, and we chose to savor every single moment. On March 27, I went in for a heart check-up with Dr. Kirkland, only to be met with an empty ultrasound and even emptier hearts. From November 1 to March 27 was the length of her life. As parents, we were grateful for every single second, even the heartbreaking ones.
Our favorite memory of Mallory James was our third ultrasound after we received the devastating news. I will never forget how active she was in my womb that day, dancing with joy and giving her parents a wave. I imagine that’s how she is now - dancing in heaven and praising her true Father.
Throughout my pregnancy, I continued to work out, maintaining good fitness and a strong mind. I want to give a huge shoutout to the U.S. Performance Center staff in Charlotte, N.C., for tending to my needs and being completely understanding and supportive of my situation. The USPC staff played a significant role in my return to play.
After having several months to process everything that happened, we decided it was best for all parties if I returned to play. After many discussions with Head Coach David Passmore, he graciously agreed to reinstate me into the selection pool for the upcoming Paris 2024 Olympic Games. I resumed full training on April 8.
As most of you understand, a woman’s body changes during pregnancy. Carrying our daughter for 18 weeks altered my body in certain ways. I didn't feel as sharp when running, my appearance had changed, and my body reacted as if I had given birth. These could have been significant roadblocks, but by God’s mercy, I was able to continue fighting for my career.
Selections for the Olympic team were announced on June 7, following our final FIH Hockey Pro League leg. Returning from our eight games in Europe and the United Kingdom, I was proud of my training and gameplay over the last two months. I had given my all and was honored and proud regardless of the selection result. When I opened the selection file, the tears began. My husband was sitting next to me, and my sister and her family were in town. I couldn’t believe it -my name was there.
The opportunity to represent my country at the highest level has always been a privilege, but this selection was different. I wasn’t just fighting for a spot for myself anymore; I was fighting for my daughter and for women who have lost their children. This perspective allowed me to step onto the pitch in Paris with confidence in my body, pride in my country, and a clear mind.
Although this past year has been extremely challenging, the Lord has shown me and my family His mercy and love. “For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you a hope and a future” (Jeremiah 29:11). Looking back, I wouldn’t change any decision my husband and I made. We chose to fight for our daughter, to love her, and to fight for my hockey career.
Now, sitting in the Olympic village, I am filled with gratitude for where I am. Gratitude for my daughter, even if our time together was short-lived. Gratitude for my husband, who has been my rock and safe place. Gratitude for our friends and family who walked through this loss with us. And lastly, gratitude to USA Field Hockey, the staff, and my teammates for being understanding, supportive, and not giving up on me.
I also want to thank USA Field Hockey for allowing me to share my story, and I pray it reaches the hearts and homes of many.
Here are a few words from Head Coach, David Passmore. Teammate and friend, Kelee Lepage. Teammate, captain, and friend, Amanda Golini:
“As a parent myself, I can only imagine how challenging the past few months have been for Megan, her husband, and their family. Despite these difficulties, I hope she can take pride in her journey, the obstacles she overcame, and her determination to rejoin the competition. When Megan first shared that her pregnancy was high-risk and that she had lost the baby, my immediate concern was for her health and mental well-being. She was proactive in using hockey as a means to cope, but I initially worried that she had missed too much time and had too much ground to cover physically to make it to Paris. We decided to push her beyond what was physiologically advisable, which carried risks. Megan undertook extra sessions beyond what the rest of the squad was doing, often sacrificing rest days. Despite these challenges, she defied the odds, made the necessary gains, and demonstrated the killer instinct needed to be selected for Paris. Though I was surprised, I was thrilled that she made it back in time and was delighted to see her fully embrace the Olympic experience.”
- David Passmore, USWNT Head Coach
“Megan and I were instant friends when we moved to Charlotte 3 years ago - united by our faith in Christ!
I remember the day Megan told me she was pregnant - we were at UNCC about to go into a team meeting and she told me through the bathroom stall. I immediately screamed and embraced her in a hug, joy filled (with a few happy tears), I prayed over her, Stuart, and her baby. When a friend gets pregnant you only truly expect the best to happen, so when Megan told me there were complications I could not comprehend. Walking with Megan and Stuart during this time of extreme uncertainty, I witnessed their raw honest emotions and full dependence on God. It would have been easy for them to turn and run from God but instead they chose to dive deeper into their faith and surrender their circumstance to the one who creates all of their days. Losing a child is heartbreaking, and even as Meg’s friend, I can only understand so much of the pain her family experienced. I am so proud to be her friend, to watch her join back in training, bring a new beautiful perspective to this life, patiently wait for selection with hope filled faith, and celebrate becoming an Olympian!
Through him we have also obtained access by faith into this grace in which we stand, and we rejoice in hope of the glory of God. Not only that, but we rejoice in our sufferings, knowing that suffering produces endurance, and endurance produces character, and character produces hope, and hope does not put us to shame, because God's love has been poured into our hearts through the Holy Spirit who has been given to us. Romans 5:2-5”
- Kelee Lepage, USWNT Teammate
“There are few challenges that are marked by greater difficulty than reaching an Olympic Games, and yet, Megan’s story puts the trials and obstacles of an Olympic dream in perspective. Megan’s story is one marked by faith, resilience, and determination.
From my perspective, when Megan first shared with me her pregnancy news in confidence, days out from selection for the Olympic Qualifier, I was filled with joy watching her be giddy over the news. Being a mom meant the world to Megan. And yet, there was no denying, a part of me also felt for her. Over the course of the past year, I had witnessed Megan challenge herself and stay the course vying for selection and hopeful for what the upcoming year would hold with the Olympic dream on the horizon. All I hoped for her, and she knew it, was for her individual efforts to be rewarded, but regardless, our new focus was her baby and her health.
This news was a milestone for Megan personally. As a teammate and friend, it’s always been obvious Megan’s hopes and dreams to become a mom. She lights up and exudes joy when she imagines that chapter of life. Likewise, it was monumental for our program. Megan would be the first athlete to be protected under our newly implemented Pregnancy & Maternity Leave Policy. As a team, motherhood is a topic we don’t shy away from and have chosen to embrace. In our program’s history, for various barriers, two-time Olympian, Keli-Smith Puzo, has been the only athlete to become a mom and return to the international stage. Our team had plans to change that landscape making it more viable for future athletes like Megan. Back in May 2023, the U.S. Women’s National Team’s leadership group approached USA Field Hockey requesting for the addition of a Pregnancy & Maternity Leave policy. With the support of the organization, we worked to author and adopt a new policy in an effort to promote the well-being of all athletes present and future. At the news of Megan’s pregnancy, it was no surprise that the team enthusiastically rallied behind her with love and support. We were excited about the journey she was set to embark on, the impact she would have on our program, and the precedent it would set for the future of our team.
Months later, Megan informed the team of the details surrounding her high-risk pregnancy. Despite the negative outlook, Megan remained positive. Handling the situation with transparency and grace, she moved through each day looking for normalcy. Modifying workouts where needed, she continued to show up, putting one foot in front of the other and taking each day at a time.
Soon, however, the team would learn of Megan’s devastating loss as she shared her story and leaned into her faith. Although the Olympic dream gave Megan hope and an avenue to focus her attention, she carried the burden of her loss and the love for Mallory with her. With Olympic roster selection looming, she was steadfast in her approach to each day. She embraced her experience, allowing it to serve as a driving force, her quiet motivation, as she fought for her chance to become an Olympian. And fight she did.
As a leader, the reality was that I didn’t always know what Megan needed - it was unchartered territory. But I did know, as a captain, teammate, and more importantly, a friend, my responsibility was to support her and make her feel safe to process what she was going through. Checking in regularly and setting no expectations on how she was or should be feeling, my goal was to listen, give her the space to express herself, validate her feelings, and most importantly, honor her wishes.
Megan’s story and return to the pitch is inspiring. Her strength and hope are, and will always be, a reflection of her faith, which has never wavered in the face of adversity. Although remarkable, I am not only proud to witness her Olympic debut in the wake of her loss, but for her faith to keep going - to fight. I’m proud of her vulnerability to share her story, bringing awareness to a topic that often remains unspoken. I’m sure your experience will inspire hope and strength in others.
Megan – thank you for sharing your story with the world.”
- Amanda Golini, USWNT Captain